HOTSPOTS

A Letter to my unborn child

2011-02-05T00:17:00.001+03:00

My Dear Elfin,

If any of our mythological and literary stories which suggests that the almighty actually waits to send in his beloved to the right person at the right time are anything to go by, then am sure you are having a whale of time with Him, don’t you?
Baby, there’s immense pressure from all corners for your parents to bring in you as early as possible and your parents like any other ‘planning’ couple's reply will be an unflattering smile with a nod. But believe me, bringing you to into this world would have been the most easiest thing to do but what truly matters is the justification of bringing you. Your parents wedding is the prototypical ‘arranged marriage’ with number of baggage tagging along with it. We didn’t want to bring you at that moment when we ourselves were lost and were fishing our own identities in the relationship. Therefore, we wanted our own time to build that foundation so as to ensure that we are geared up to raise you in a healthy environment. So yeah we are taking our time, but baby, this holds good with any kind of relationships that involves human. We’ve to have humungous patience , understanding and whatnot to deal with it. Even your's & mine relationship will not stand out to this definition. We are going to have our fair share of differences, admonishments, fights, but what is more important than any of this is that our bond would get poignant & unfathomable with every single moment & instances in our life.It’s not that we’ve never thought about you. If anything, we are now thinking more about you. We talk about you when we happen to meet any of our friend's children; when we watch cartoon network (yeah,yeah your parents still watch these :) ) and in so many such like instances. These days you are featuring primarily on our weekend ‘long drives’ which was meant only to discuss about us two . We‘ve also started zeroing on names for you. Oh, no , no really not the name featuring at the beginning of this post ,that’s just your blog name.

If I'd somehow given you the impression that am going to be one ardent and not -so-fun- to -be -with mother, then , yes you are right, baby. But don’t you worry, your ecstatic father would atone it. Not sure why, but I somehow get the feel that you are going to be your ‘daddy’s child‘. During those talks on our drives that I’ve mentioned before, when the topic arises about you and for some reason I become all ‘motherly’ and say things like I would whack you and stuff he’s turning in to this protective father and already saving your imaginary bum from it. So yes, you ARE going to turn into one like him and being his progeny I would only be apprehensive only if it was the other way around. No am not grumbling and am sort of making my peace with it. Yet I secretly love to see you as a smaller adaptation of him and take on his genes from being charismatic, good-natured, well-behaved, poignant person. Though ,if you dare to take on his food fussiness then I warn you now only that I would be forced to do what am unable to do to your father. All said and done don’t even dream that your father would prioritize you over me and he knows this better than anyone . Don‘t ask me why because that‘s the way it is .Well, if you are a boy, you will understand this at the right time and if you are a girl, oh come on, you know it already :).

Baby, there are times when I really envy you. Yes, I envy you because you are rich and am poor. You heard it right, you are rich in the sense that there’s something in abundance with you already that I’ve yearned and still yearning in my life and that’s the unconditional love from your extended family. To begin with, you’ve two wonderful sets of grandparents. If your maternal grandparents are going to teach you the fun of life, your paternal grandparents are going to teach you the values of life. Both of them are already planning on the dos and don’ts of and after your arrival. If you are going to bitch about your parents ,talk anything and everything under the sun to your aunt from my side then you are going to be spoilt & pampered from your great uncles & great aunts from your father’s side. If you are going to talk things that involves books, films and stuff like that to your uncle from my side then you’ve another uncle from your father’s side who could teach how to drive , sing and so on. If your elder sister on my side is going to be over protective & supportive and show off her elder sister status to you in whatsoever case, then you’ve a bunch of uncles waiting from your father’s side to educate you on the kind of pranks & mischievous they had played & thought it would be funny. Oh, did I tell you that you are one of the few luckiest being to have a great-grandmother from your father’s side. These are the kind of relations that are tailor- made for you , apart from this you will also go on to meet and make new friends which would obviously be of your whims. But let me tell you something, these are some of the treasures that you must hold on very strongly in your life. You can always lean on to them & trust you with them irrespective of me being around or not. They would welcome you with open hands and will hold you tight to them.

You know baby, every mother has a dream about her child and your mother is no exception to that. I have dreams of what you have to become of all which are what am not. I want you to be a sports enthusiast like your father or better even a sports person. I would like to see you in one of those uniformed forces marching pride for the country. I would love if you have special interests in arts like painting, singing, and so on. I would be the happiest person if you take on your father in acquiring the knowledge of math, you see your mother was not that very bright on all these areas. Again, don’t worry that am going to be some tiger mom to thrust you into things that you are not willing to do. Am only trying to live my life vicariously through you and I swear that you’ll be given a more peaceful , healthy and a democratic upbringing. Even if I go against all that I’ve said, you can be assured that your father will be taking on your side , so yeah you’ve yet another reason to become the daddy’s child. Whatever your choices would be you will always remain our child and that’s what matters in it’s entirety .

So, that’s about it. Rest in next and hoping to meet you soon :)

With love,
Amma.

Of the New beginnings & the New year…

2011-01-03T22:19:00.001+03:00

Every time it would happen & it happened this time also. The realization that a new year has dawned and has brought in some newer beginnings ,some closures on the old ‘chapters’ would really set in quite late with in me and by that time the bell rings in my head bang! another year would have fell in place . 2010 was no such exception.The year had just whizzed past me quite peacefully and rather uneventful, as in ,with no major challenges or hurts , but came with a irreparable loss on the personal front. Beginning of the year was when the tragic struck when we lost the person whom I’ve had immense faith, respect ,loved & adored immensely to the deadly disease of advanced tuberculosis. My grandmother to us was one-of -a -kind woman. She was strong, independent , forward thinking and above all a woman with substance. She could debate on anything & everything under the sun right from the politics to modern day cinema. She was a scribe to the visually challenged people & she helped them with their daily lessons by reading & writing their school or college work. Apart from my mother she’s the next woman to have induced the kind of respect that I’ve now for the age-old institution called ‘marriage’, while I would really not delve too much into the intricacies of it, which by itself would be a different post ,I would like to highlight one interesting habit of her’s which would sketch the rest of her character. A midst the women who would try gathering the sympathies & the accolades they expect for the paltry gestures from their spouses and talk ’liberation’ and stuff even at the drop of a hat , here was the woman who had shed all her epicures of food willfully ever since my grandfather was diagnosed with diabetes & three blocks in heart . The gesture might be as small as it is but the impact was great as it is. While I could go on more about her yet am still struggling to come on terms of her absence in this world.

Other wise the year was THE most peaceful I‘ve ever had. I’d turned into a full-time home maker and have now completely made my peace with this fact because anyway a person with one and half a year break in her resume is nothing short of a new comer and now even if I wish to join back the work force am going to be treated as one. But no, definitely I’ve no complaints on that and if anything I thoroughly enjoyed and am enjoying this stint as a home maker. I’ve some thing with me which others long for and that is … TIME!! So yeah, absolutely am fine with it. The past year had given me tons of opportunities to explore on the arenas that I love like reading , traveling, enhancing my culinary skills , spending that kind of time which I really wanted with the spouse and at the same time the ‘me’ time that I’d yearned for. I continued with my passions for learning languages and enrolled myself in French & English literature.

I truly wish this newly dawned year also follows the same league of it’s predecessor. Am a non-believer of taking resolutions on the beginning of the year which will anyway go in the drain just as the day ends leave alone following it for the entire year. But the few things that I could like to see the changes in myself will be

- to continue with my reading by taking more challenges & completing at least 50-75 books this year. Whoa!! Quite ambitious :)

- to instill that kind of discipline to write more even if it’s not up to the mark.

- To reach that ideal weight by religiously walking & through diet.

- To do the work with utmost concentration and sincerity.

- To shed all those excess undesirable emotional baggage and think positive.

In a way I’ve chronicled this so I take a cue of this every time I open this page and provide with that urge to make the change happening. So, here’s to the new beginning & to a very happy new year .

Of some ‘untold’ things ..

2010-06-17T23:01:00.004+03:00

Can anyone in this world forget our adolescent time: the time when we force ourselves to loose the child-innocence and start acting like big people, the time when we are embarrassed when our mamma calls us baby in front of our friends, the time when we get conscious about how we look eternally, the time when we appreciate nature’s gift such as rains ,sceneries’, the time when we believe in those fairy-tale stories and trust that those are for real and imagine ourselves to be the protagonists and wait for our prince charming or our lady love. It’s the time when we first experience that moment of our life, the moment when we realize that there are swarm of butterflies that flutters in us as we see that person .
I’d experienced this fluttering for the first time while I was in grade eight when I saw this boy, let’s call him A , who fitted right into the expression ‘tall, dark and handsome’. He was not that kind of a major “head-turner”,neither do I, but yet there was this unexplained vibe(oh yeah, yeah, that Indian movies effect as u are already thinking) whenever I saw him. I sort of found him little funnily weird as he had a little larger ears which didn’t sync that well with his other wise usual round small face. He was on the other section and I met him during one of those art classes where in both the sections were combined. I met him eye to eye when I’d accidentally stumbled upon his book and wanted to return it to him. I couldn’t resist myself in staring at him for quite sometime while I felt there were those people playing violins besides me( yep,from that same movie :)), and came back to my senses, when he’d called my name a little louder. I did a little background check got to know some of his details like his family, friends , interests and so from some of our common friends. From then on , I made sure that I didn’t dare to bunk the otherwise boring classes and also tried very hardly to make myself omnipresent. I spent days thinking about him and grabbed every opportunity to go in and come out of his class, sometime genuine and many a times feigned. For my friends I came as a surprise shocker as the friend whom they saw as a very shy, timid and not-so-interesting girl doing some crazy things and finally became their “laughing stock” for all their presumably ‘funny’ jokes. But nothing tugged me down and I was acting even more crazier just so I could get back at them. I tried all possible way to impress him but the introvert that I am and also by some fear of rejection, the boy obviously had no clue about it. This little crush of mine came to a logical end when his family moved out of town half way thro’ the year for some reasons which I apparently came to know thro’ some of our common friends. Though it hit very hard at that moment, somehow it did not make that profound impact that I thought it would. Just as the popular adage goes, time became the perfect healer and his memories and thoughts blurred and today, I don’t even have a clue of what & where he is now. It was more like a passing clouds that poured down heavily and evanesce off in the sky without perturbing the flow of life. After this , apparently there were couple of others that just didn’t even last for few days , but all of which were untold before I really understood what the real ‘love’ meant. Though it’s funny now, but if I could just sit back and get a little introspective about it I cannot help but to think on the ignorance I’d at that point of time in thinking that ‘this was it’ and go little over board without even realizing on what and how relationships works. As time and age progressed my ideas on relationships bettered and today am surely in the best place I could have ever imagined with the love of my life with dearth of any repent.

PS : I’d written this for blogadda’s contest, but understably am late by two days ,nevertheless thought of posting. Thanks for blogadda for making me to reminisce my good old days.

Of more books…

2010-06-12T16:30:00.000+03:00

Three Cups of Tea By Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin :

I chanced upon this book while I was reading this . The writer had so eloquently written about the book that it instigated me instantaneously to pick the book my self. Do I repent or what , if anything, am grateful for the blogger to have introduced me to this wonderful experience. The popular adage “failures are the stepping stones of success” proved true literally to this man. What could have been a personal accomplishment turned out to be a accomplishment for the society. The book is about Mr. Greg Mortenson ,an American mountaineer who reaches the village of Korphe in Pakistan accidentally ,which changes the history for good on a failed expedition ,who was on his way to reach the peak of K2. Greg is moved by warmth of the locals and instantaneously reciprocates the love and affection. He further learns about the plight of the schools and understands their needs. He was appalled when he learns that the nearest hospital for them was somewhere two-day drive. He goes back to his country promising the people that he would soon return to change this scenario. This was/ is the turning point for both Mr. Greg and also for the village. From then on there was no looking back for Mr. Greg who by now have built hundreds of schools in the most vulnerable areas of Pakistan and Afghanistan. He achieves his mission by building one school at a time and is a strong believer of girl’s education which he believes will eradicate the ignorance of the society. The book also shares some interesting perspective of the so-called “conservative Islamists “ as the truth is somewhere far from what is been perceived by the mass by and large. The perfect example of such is HajI Ali who was the “Nurmadhar” or the chief of Korphe. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration if it’s said that HajI ali was the mentor for Greg, for it was he who taught him on how to deal with things that was alien to him. It was pleasant to read how Greg adopted and adapted the local practices which even includes the dress code of the inhabitants. It was a revelation when we come to know that Greg also learnt their language Bali to become one among them. It was definitely not a cake walk for Greg to attain this “heights”. There were number of instances which if not for him any one else would have given up this spectacular mission. The chilling kidnap of Greg in the remote place of Waziristan, Pakistan where he was abducted for eight days and finally seen off with the contributions from them for his mission is just one among those myriad instances. There were also number of ‘fatwas’ issued by various muslim organizations to stop Greg or rather “infidel” to work in the muslim dominated area. But each time, Greg bounced back with more power to serve the people. There’s a wide belief that good people would be surrounded by equally good people and this belief seems to be true, right from HajI Ali to his personal guard Faisal Baig who vowed himself that he wouldn’t leave Greg anywhere alone in the vicinity of Pakistan since the episode of that abduction to many to name a few. This unique traits of Greg has been bequeathed by his parents who were no less than Greg’s mission. Greg’s parents were responsible for building schools and hospital in the much neglected area of Tanzania and also established Kilimanjaro Christian Medical center. The book also shares the experience of this American who was in an extremely remote village of Pakistan opening schools along with his colleague from Central Asia Institute during on the world’s biggest disaster of the twin-tower blast happening in his country And by now if there’s an impression that Greg is this “perfect” man has been created in the minds, then the answer would be a big NO. Greg has his own limitations like how the co-author David Oliver Relin points how Greg was unpunctual, like wise, there are also number of instances which describes about Greg’s insomnia and many like these. But one cannot deny that all these looked trivial before his big mission. The book was definitely a page turner and it was more gratifying and humbling experience to know and read about people like him. Greg has also come up with his second book “stones into schools “ which elucidates his experience in Afghanistan. We can also read Greg’s interview from here.

The Museum of Innocence by Orhan Pamuk :

This was one book which was on my wish list for quite sometime after reading raving reviews. The book was worth all the wait. It’s story of wealthy business man in Turkey, Istanbul who is truly madly deeply in love with a shopkeeper -distant cousin, Fusun despite him being engaged to his rich girlfriend , Sibel. The love later on turns into an obsession and looses her in the mid way. Did Kemal win his love , if he did , did it love last forever forms the rest of the story. This book can be compared with any of our contemporary Indian cinema but what makes the difference is the narration. The author has spoken from the point Kemal knows Fusun’s existence which is when she was still a fetus in her mother’s womb while he himself was almost sixteen years old. The author has walked us thro’ the Istanbul streets and have brought in the transformation of Istanbul both culturally and as a country while he was narrating a flamboyant love story in a good five hundred and odd pages. The book was a memorable read and ‘unputdownable’ to me. This review gave a more meaningful insight about this wonderful book.

My Sister’s keeper by Jodi Picoult :

Pics Courtesy : Amazon.com

The book caught my attention for its unique tag line when I was browsing thro’ some books at the store and back home did a small research on the same. It’s story of how a child is ‘engineered’ to save her first child from leukemia. It elaborates on the emotions that as a family they are going thro’ and the legal hassles that follow. The author has used the multiple scheme of narrators who talks from their point of perspective. Of all the characters ,Sara Fitzgerald is one who would invoke a concoction of emotions ranging from love, hatred, sympathize ,empathize , anger all at the same time but, if any anything , this is one character whom we would never want to be. The book was definitely a great read for the plot, for the way it was written and for the literature. But yet the read was emotionally exhausting and was continually meandering in my mind throughout and I really had to take a serious break from reading.

What to write??

2010-06-05T14:58:00.002+03:00

The one thing that has been consistent of this space is my INCONSISTENCY and I’ve no qualms in saying so. Am I ashamed of this or do I attribute it to some mundane or clichéd excuses like “No time, been busy” ,”life has not taken any earth shattering change to write about” and such like. But nothing of that sorts. It was my pure inability to translate my feelings to words. It’s as simple as that. Not a single day had passed without me staring into this blank page wanting to tell so much and make my voice heard leading to typing something and back spacing it instantaneously. By the time I perform this ritual of write -and- delete - and-write , the moment would have surpassed blurring the thinking process further. Am not a prolific writer , for that instance, not even an average writer, to get inspired by scenic beauties or flower blossoming to write creatively and bring those wonderful moments before the reader’s eyes. If anything it’s only my thoughts that rule this space. There were umpteen number of thoughts that was meandering thro’ my mind , several of which would surpass as it comes and many of which sustained creating a profound impact in me . There have been instances where I’ve let my inundating feeling to pass by unnoticed owing to the repercussions that might follow. That’s when a small identity crisis crippled, as in, this space which was meant to be exclusive for me , which was started with a distinct motive of expressing “honestly“, should itself be estranged. I didn’t know! I didn’t have answers to the myriad questions rising in my mind. But there was a point where I really felt the need for the resilience and watch the world pass by as a mere spectator with no strings attached to it. It was quite an experience to watch things at a distant. This process was really a great learning curve and has changed my perspective of life. Life at a distance was heaven but at the same time it was funnily weird at times. I really have so much to say and write but as of now am restraining myself to write more so as to learn from the world more.

The Long lost love..

2010-02-21T23:11:00.004+03:00

… And that is finally found. Isn’t it always a bliss to be doing what we love to do without any guilt towards to it. If that it is, then in a way, I could really boast of it. Given the current “unemployed “ state of mine , or can I give myself a bit of benefit and call a “homemaker” , where I’ve all the time in this entire galaxy enough to do things that I like the most ,apart from the domestic chores, and by that, reading was not that far away. I was definitely not that kind of a child who loves to go out and meet friends and play as if there’s no tomorrow. I’ve a very blurred memory of the number of times I‘ve actually played in the entire span of my childhood. And that was when my affair with the books had begun. I still remember the first book that I actually laid my hands on , “Gokulam” the English magazine of a Tamil weekly popular named KALKI , exclusively for kids. This book gave me the perspective of “reading” beyond the prescribed text books. The book contained variety genres like short stories, animated stories, regulars and so on. It also had an agony-aunt sort of column where in the kids of the age ranging from 8-16 poured their agonies. There were times when I could relate to most of the queries asked ,though my favorite part of the book was the story of a mouse family which comprised of mother, father, sister and brother and the story would weave brilliantly around their trials and tribulations ,love, affection and also would talk about the sibling rivalry. The simple English and the educative articles edged this book amongst others. Besides there were also other similar books like champak which kindled the interest to read books. After this, I’d slowly graduated to read books like Nancy Drew , Hardy boys , Famous Five and such like. I still remember how insanely I sank in the books in my hand oblivious of the happenings around me. Those were the times when I forsake my physical training classes only to sneak into the library and get in touch with the books that I‘d left half way. This little habit of mine tardily faded paving way for the ever-growing responsibilities and changing priorities. Now with all this once-professional-turned - homemaker tag thought this would be the time to revamp this long lost love which I’d decided to grab it covetously :) . I was scouring the net to find what was in vogue in the literature world - the books, the reviews and such like and inferred the ones that are now adorning the side bar of this page. There are numerous blogs that I’d discovered which is written so eloquently making me feel small in front of their literary skills which I‘ve decided to hone strenuously. In lieu of this, I’ve also been following closely with the recently held Jaipur literature festival where all the big shots from the literature world had met and discussed the literature as such. But the dreams were shattered when I heard that this part of the world does not boast of a decent library or in fact ANY library. After an incessant search with a failed mission of finding one led to discovery of an awesome book store which had everything that I desired for . This was when the spouse connived at me to OWN it. I say it as a big deal because, yes it is as such , with the kind of books that am lured to, buying it would prove it to be pricey but then the spouse gave a go- ahead much to my excitement. So now there’s a mini library in the offing at my place :). Though I loved to read from all genres but am thoroughly an avid reader of fiction . So, here are some of my thoughts on the books that I’ve read so far, this is also to keep track on the books that I read.

Brida by Paulo Coelho :

This book is a story of an Irish girl named Brida who embarks a journey in search of knowledge. During that journey she meets people who contribute in a way on her ‘self’ discovery. It’s a simple plot with spiritual annotations adorning it. This book was recommended by my ex-colleague who was way too impressed with the book. It was not much of an interest while I was read it as the story was reding things that I hardly was being able to relate, IMO.

P.S. I Love You By Cecelia Ahern :

Yes, yes, you heard it right. It's quite an old one as the book was published in the year 2004 and it’s movie adoption on 2007.So, yeah I read it late :).
It’s the debut novel of the author and the story revolves around the couple Holly and Gerry who are truly , madly and deeply in love. Gerry dies of a chronic disease and he writes 10 letters before his death to his wife in order to make her move on with her life sans him.
The plot is as poetic , romantic and tragic true to it’s sense but I still felt it could’ve been narrated in an even more elegant way. The book at times wanders far away from the plot and at times it gets repetitive. Despite small falls, this book definitely is one of my favorites just for the simple reason - The Plot.

The White Tiger By Aravind Adiga :

The Indian author is the winner of the Man Booker prize and I can see why it is. The book is about a village simpleton who is servant-turned-murderer -turned - entrepreneur. He says about his rise in the form of a single letter to the Chinese Premier in seven nights.
The book holds onto our attention from the word Go. Exceedingly well written . There’s a dark humor in the way Balram, the protagonist of the book, narrates his experiences. Though I must admit that there were times when I was perturbed by the fact that my country was shown in poor light, or if I could put it this way, the dark side of my country. But I would like to leave it at that.

The Alchemist By Paulo Coelho :
This is the story of a shepherd Santiago embarks on a journey to follow his dream and eventually learn the art of listening to what his heart says. “The Alchemist” is a widely read book and always been recommended by people who have read. And now I echo these recommendations. It’s definitely a good read if we understand the underlying message.

Twilight By Stephanie Meyer :

The debut novel of the author where a girl Bella ,meets a boy Edward who in turn is a vampire and yet she’s head-over heels in love with him. The book has a few extremely chilling moments ,like, when we get to know the age of Edward , which is otherwise just a mediocre teen love novel .Am still not sure on what exactly made to pick this one , may be just to see what the ‘saga’ was all about. There were some instances which reminisced my school days , the place where we tend to meet our “crush”. All said and done this is definitely not my “kind”.

Currently on the shelf :

The Museum of Innocence By Orhan Pamuk :

I don’t think I can write something about this since am half way thro it. But yes, the reviews of the book is awe-inspiring consistently.

On My Wishlist:

Though this list is never ending , but these are my immediate interests :

1) My Sister’s keeper By Jodi Picoult
2) Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson & David Oliver Relin
3) Reading Lolita in Tehran By Azar Nafisi
4) The Palace of Illusions By Chitra Banerjee.

And I hope to continue with this love :).

Am I handicapped?

2010-01-07T18:58:00.000+03:00

When it comes to writing, or, by and large expressing?? This is probably one of the questions that I’ve been contemplating in the recent past but in vain to counter the thoughts. The long dearth from this little space of mine stands testament to it. Not that my life has become less eventful ever since I turned to be a home maker or have not blinkered about the events happening around the world, as a matter of fact I’ve loads of things to be shared, to fret on, to be contented, to reminisce about and so on. But yet, when I would think of articulating the same I would profoundly feel disconnected between my thought process and the sense of expression albatrossing me. Having said that, guess what’s my challenge for this year :- To overcome this disability of mine and I hope to recuperate from it soon.

Desu Chudayya… Pardes bulayya…

2009-11-13T12:59:00.003+03:00

It’s been a real long time since I’d even visited this little space of mine, leave alone writing something on it. Thanks to those THE most chaotic weeks after this. With just a week for a radical change in my life, my wheels were on full spree with shopping, closing on accounts, finalizing on the things to be taken with, visiting relatives on and on and on. And the last few days were even more crazier enough to make me even forget to breathe. The house was full with throngs of HD’s relatives pouring in and honestly that made things even more chaotic as his aunt fell sick of high pressure and had to be rushed to hospital just before the last few hours of our departure. Things returned to normalcy only after the doctor’s affirmation that she’s fine and had to some rest. After that unfortunate thing, we were again busy with some last minute checking and finally, we were off to airport with literally a bandwagon to see us off. We entered the airport with the sea of heavy baggage unaware of the other “tamasha” waiting for us in the airport where HD and me ruffled a bit in front of complete strangers as to what items have to be offloaded to reduce the baggage. Clearing off the baggage ,bidding adieu to the apparently anxious HD’s relatives , and clearing the string of formalities , we finally crashed onto the seats in the lounge of the airport in the wee hours ,waiting to aboard a new phase of life. It was only on that moment did I perceive the impact of this “new” life. Soon I would be leaving the place which had seen my life’s ups and downs, joys, sorrows and above all the familiarity of at least few a people when I walked down the street and

that made me realize that I had not only bid adieu to the people but apparently to at least a quarter of my life. All this was interrupted by a female voice announcing on the details of boarding the flight and there, HD and I picked our bags and walked towards the flight contemplating on what god has in store for us. Subsequently after seating on the flight and while browsing through the magazines my eyes which was sleep -deprived for the last 18 hrs finally took some rest. And HD was all the more enthused in showing me some amazing scenic from the top like sea , desert and blah blah was like singing in unresponsive ears as I was drooling down in his shoulders. Finally the journey to my other phase of life ended or rather begun while the captain announced the safe landing and I entered the city with mixed bag of emotions which was an unique sense of joy and at the same time lot of apprehensions dominating. The drive from the airport to home introduced me to those landscape buildings, the people dressed in the attire which I’ve seen only on the movies and the special notice was the range of cars that were plying on the overly - disciplined lanes. And I realized that the place was just a replica of my city, not a single time did I feel that I was on the other part of the world. Though the first few days was spent more on catching up with the lost sleep due to the crazy schedules back home and the other being the jet lag. Furthermore , here the days went quite busy in adjusting to the local time and setting up the home which , even after three months ,is still half way in completion. All said and done, I must accept that the life here is completely different from the one that I’d been living for the last few years and in HD’s words life here is ‘so far so good’.

PS: This post was lying in my draft for considerate amount of time and finally saw the light of the day.

Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna..

2009-07-10T18:38:00.003+03:00

No more those long hours of drowning in to the system; No more of those frantic calls from the clients; No more gossiping with friends over the cup of coffee; No more of those long sometimes sensical and many a times non-sensical meetings and there are many more which could be added to the never-ending list. It’s for a life of about three years to which I’d bid adieu yesterday with a heavy heart. Yes, now you are now reading this space of an educated, skilled unemployed youth :). I was fresh out of college when I'd joined work and I was this all this over- enthusiastic girl who was all geared up for a new challenge to face. Right from then life was a roller coaster ride with sea of joyful , cherishing and at times depressing waves touching me. It has made me what am today. And this phase of life did give in that confidence and it DID bring that pride in me. On the flip side, like any other it had its own unfavourable effects on me. There are a lot of things in life that I’d given a miss, some which are irrevocable, irreconcilable. I crossed the threshold of my most imperative phase of life with a hasten. I’d become work alcoholic without even me becoming conscious about it. Under stably, I cannot blame work, as in, for it as should have been ‘me’ who should have struck a balance between work and life. On the whole it was a real ‘experience’ which can be looked back and cherish those once-for-all moments.
And that also means that there’s a new beginning not only on the professional side but on the geographical side which was the sole reason behind this ‘unemployed’ state of mind. Yes, I would be soon go away leaving behind my motherland; my culture; my heritage on the whole.

More to come on this .... :)

What a Shame!!!!

2009-07-10T06:02:00.002+03:00

News such as these talks about the precariousness on the very existence of something called as “Humanity” itself. It was a series of imbecility and every damn thing went wrong here. Do these human predators understand as to what kind of “contribution” they make to the society? As someone said, only if the punishments become corporal will the crime rates come down. Am low to the extent of even to write something on this and completely handicapped :(

If only I could..

2009-06-17T16:34:00.005+03:00

Not sure if I've ever posted a forward on my blog. But after receiving this, I couldn't resist posting one which reflects the golden phase of my life :) Without much of my rants or prattles what ever.. here's what I'd received as a mail but mirrored my thoughts and re-kindled my past :)

Remembering my classmates,after few years,
My eyes were filled with tears,
Everyone now is busy a lot,
No one escaped from detiny's plot

Saw the girl whome once I thought as my best friend,
oops today she is somebody else's girl friend,
After months, remembered about her for a little while,
Heard she is happy, that made me smile.

Project reviews to Campus Interviews,
Nicknames to last bench games,
cultural rehersald to love proposals,
short term crushes to class room blushes.

Everything is fresh in our mind,
wish life could just rewind,
Let's laugh, play and rejoice,
Once again become college guys.

Chatting and laughing, we all were in elation,
till the painful moment of separation,
when it was time to part,
we returned with a heavy heart.

Today life is full of commitments,
And too many worries,
But those cherished moments,
Will live forever in our memories!!!!
If only I could go back on a time machine and relive those moments..
Sigh!!!

RIP

2009-06-11T14:51:00.001+03:00

Yesterday I woke to the frantic call from my sis only to tell me about the fateful news of the sudden demise of her dearest friend whom she knew from their childhood days, maybe say from their 6th grade or even lesser. Unlike me, my sister has swarm of friends among whom this anna, as I fondly call him (anna means brother for non- Tamil readers) was the best. It is for sure not just a say, but true to the meaning of it. He was one of the coolest guys I’ve ever met. His eyes would speak volumes about him. He would stand out distinctively even among a crowd and if there’s a place which is much chirpier and happy and the reason for that would be undoubtedly him. He has a charm by himself which would seek the attention of others even without him virtually soliciting for. He was so unique in his own ways and I say so much because he did have a dark past and it was really a miracle and of course with sheer god’s blessing did he come out of it with a bang. But this time, I believe god decided the other way, and decided to have him for himself for ever. I’ve run thro this anna only on certain occasions, just by the relation of my sister, and by this itself the thought about him makes me feel so low on loosing him, I can only imagine what my sister and her whole bunch of friends will be going through. All I am doing right now is to pray the almighty to give them and his family the strength to face this state of affairs. And also May anna’s soul rest in peace.

We will Miss u Anna, For ever and ever..

Revelation of Parenthood

2009-05-22T14:27:00.002+03:00

I was and did comprehend a lot of mommy blogs and have been flabbergasted by the way they would articulate. They write with so much of ardour, warmth which attaches a dignity to the already esteemed mother hood. There are quite a few blogs which quiver my inner urge to be one myself such is the zeal with which they write. I’d always deliberated that it’s only moms who would express their love to their offspring and Dads are less expressive. And not long before did I stumble here and subsequently leading to read this changed my entire perspective of this rationale. Fathers are for eternity imperative right?

There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when
he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough
for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love
itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994

Reading few others, I couldn’t stop myself in thinking about my own dad (though this might be like off the topic). While my mother did carry the entire burden in raising us while dad was solely the bread winner of the family. Thanks to his marketing job, he was always on his heels living mostly on the intercity trains and buses for a long term official tour making a rare guest appearance. But as time conceded and when I was growing into this ‘rationale’ girl or rather woman, I did appreciate how my father had helped mom in raising us in a roundabout way. He has and probably will never get in the way in any of my mom’s decision more than ever if it involving us. He will also not impede on any of our own lives. He has always let us been ourselves and has never tried to change things in us. True to the words of an eminent persona, my father did not tell us how to live but lived and let me watch him do it. Though we, or at least I, did miss the charisma of the father figure at home but yet doubtless, I’ve a space for myself where I could dispense out emotion, if only my father was introduced to these platforms, he could have been even more articulate.

Being Me – II

2009-05-21T14:54:00.005+03:00

Time has flown at a fast pace since I had written this. With another two years off, this year yours truly meekly hits the quarter to the century. Yes, twenty five long years of my subsistence. And true to the quote of Shakespeare:

***There was a star danced, and under that was I born***

this star was born when the other stars danced…:)
More to come but as of now ….. It’s just a very Happy Birthday to Me… :)

Am Done!!!

2009-05-20T15:40:00.002+03:00

To all those of who are airing with all your free counsel without even me soliciting it for; all I could say will be a BIG Thank You! Thanks for all those extra efforts that you put in giving away those "precious" say but yet No Thank You!! If you think that am not sane enough to do things and more over settle on things by muself for a plain reason that I tend to ask things before I do anything as a mark of respect, then probably you have flawed . With a definite fact that I did exist in this galaxy for about twenty years before I ran thro’ you I have the conviction that am proficient enough to run things on my own even if it’s going to cost me a fortune. I will truly appreciate if I am given my space to live, breath and on the whole survive! And as the quote goes by.. Please Live and let Live.

A self revelation :)

2009-05-19T15:23:00.001+03:00

You Are Ceramics

You are open to the world and it's possibilities. You are able to start something without knowing how it will end.

You trust your intuition above everything else. Going with your gut often works out.

You believe that every day objects can and should be art.

The best art allows ordinary life to be more stylish and beautiful.

What Type of Art Are You?

A New-fangled Me... :)

2009-05-18T14:27:00.003+03:00

I’ve been extensively blog hopping for while and was truly amazed at the genres which every single blog carried. I was and am reading a varied zest like food, gadgets, and mothers, personal and so on. It had really changed my discernment of this complete thought behind ‘blog’ or precisely ‘blogging’. I was jus sitting glued to the system for hours in reading those blogs that I’d instinctively developed a flair for reading by itself. Here, I’ve to be honest enough in accepting that not only was I influenced to write or rather express more, I was also disposed on the design of the blog it self. I was some how driven to write on a different platform, but given for the fact that my indiscretion on jus one, couldn’t think that I will be able to do the honors of having a second one. And finally when I decided to have a small make over of my blog that was when I found this, Thanks to Google :) . After a zillion thoughts and templates juggling I finally roped in this from here, yet there are many others which I really liked. True to the quote :

Change is the only permanent thing in this world

I hope this change is just not restricted with the design but to my stance even.

Raja Ko Rani se Pyar ho Gaya – Part II

2009-05-01T18:19:00.000+03:00

And then……
Our engagement was fixed in a very short span of two weeks without the dates of the D -Day being finalized. Though we’d mutually agreed on the proposal but we still remained unfamiliar person to each other. Thanks to HD, we decided to have the wedding on the later part of the year amidst the furor and resistance from both our families. I had a strong belief that this period of our courting would be the underpinning of my life and so I was determined to take this prospect and get to know each other. But alas, the first three months went off with not much of it as he was preparing for his dream run certified examination and hence didn’t want to disturb him much. And hence there were not much congregation it was jus those long sessions over phone... especially during the night time which would be a fitting time for repose. Now coming to the dot - the guy himself. On the first day, it was like two full-grown people sitting across the table and discussing their lives and there was nothing much further to it with neither of us not having much expectation. I must confide here that even during our engagement period we were unfamiliar person to each other. But then am really not sure of how & when exactly did I start adoring him but definitely not during our initial days, probably it just evolved with time. What really can I say about this wonderful guy?? He’s so unlike me on all aspects, be it on his endurance level, considerate; he jus charms on anything and everything he does. I would definitely say that man plays a very crucial role in keeping his family intact and also not hurt himself in the progression. Because it’s very evident that a woman leaves behind everything and enters into another family trusting none but solely her companion. Her life restarts again with him being the central point and this I could proudly say my HD has lucratively crossed without a twinge to anyone. He took the initiative of disseminating his home to me way before the moment I could actually step into his life made my ‘transition’ much simpler. There are few things which I really do not have to tell him out loud but it could have jus been done. In this entire period of me knowing him, I’ve never really seen him loosing his cool for what ever biggest mistakes I might have committed. On the contrary to me, he’s never spoken anything beyond his control even while he hit his highest point of anger. There might have been contemplations like as to what big deal is this all about, but the point here is that we were not married after a long period of courtship. And while we were actually courting, we'd almost reached a stage where it was irreversible. And now with all this am really not going to even think of reversing. I just thought about him and nothing else while I knew anything besides that could be jus fleeting away with time. What could have happened if not him, probably my journey could have been different somewhere. But I could have truly missed being the WIFE of this wonderful person; and I really mean it from the bottom of my heart…
And now am leaving this much loved song of mine to this wonderful person im much sync with my mood.. :-)

To Be Continued…
Until my life curtains comes to a draw..

The Unsung songster

2009-04-10T18:28:00.000+03:00

Have been listening to the Maalyil Yaaro from the movie Chatriyan for the nth time on my earphones. My… what a passionate number from none other that the great Raja Sir. I say this romantic one in spite of it being a solo number. In addition to Raja sir’s mesmerizing music magnificently picturised on the elegance- personified Banu Priya the other person who could silently take the credit is none other that the singer herself, Swarnalatha. Man! What a scintillating voice. I jus cannot put in any one else but for her for this song. She’s one of the singers whose profile will have a complete genre of music. This could be substantiated from the songs like Aatamma therottamma from the movie Captain Prabhakaran which is more a folk to the sensuous Hey Rama from Rangeela to the pathos like her national award winning song porale from Karuthamma to a very plain yet brilliantly sung thirumana malargal from the movie poo vellam un vasam. What an endowed singer!! And the other one which I’ve recently discovered is the song kuliruthu kuliruthu from the movie Taj Mahal composed by none other than our own ARR.Her voice would jus blend so well with the BGM and am sure it could make us fall in love once again :-) But I’ve always wondered whether if she was given the due credit which she deserves. Any ways, with not pondering much on the intricacies, I shall jus enjoy the song … And for all those of you who would really like it and wanna give a try here it is. Enjoy!

Am hurt… deeply...

2009-04-08T14:54:00.001+03:00

Like any daughter, My Dad is my Hero. He’s always been a calm, composed, passionate person and on the 25 years of this life journey I’ve never seen Appa loosing his cool... I’ve always tried to live like him... Appa’s main motto in life which he also follows conscientiously is "the more you give... the more you grow". I’ve seen him live up with his motto even if it’d cost him a fortune… And by some means I’ve imbibed this quality of his in me… I’ve always accepted things as it comes and have never really wanted it the Way I wanted… Many a times, right from my childhood ,I’ve been taken for a ride … I will constantly face bullying , bickering and on … but as a kid, I was not very vexed … I was jus so blameless that I could jus dust away from my shoulders and move on …. I’ve been and am paying a great deal even today… This one eminence has so developed in me that am now unable to completely rip it off from after having paid off profoundly… Though my inner strength has grown stronger, but there have been times when it will lead me to the boundaries of aggravation… as high to the extent of cursing, abusing, assaulting myself for having been so naïve... There have been many such instances in the recent past which has testified this eminence and the one in the recent past has unquestionably distressed me… Too many things jus ran on my mind... with too many questions which were predominantly WHY AGAIN ME???? I couldn’t take the effects jus like that… I didn’t feel like talking to anyone… I didn’t want to see anyone’s face… On the first place, I jus didn’t know how to react when I was nailed for something which I did that could have been any girl’s yearning … There was no one around for me to vent out… For the first time ever I experienced the seclusion among the swarm… I wanted to run to my mother hide my face under her lap and cry my heart out... I wanted to cuddle to my dad’s shoulder to experience his warmth… I’ve never missed them so bad in life… and I realized what they are to me… It was a revelation. It has left behind a irreparable scar in me… and has shaken my inner strength… appallingly. Though everything seems fine but still at the bottom of my heart…. AM ALL HURT…. DEEPLY….

Friend, My Earnest Apologies….

2009-04-03T17:06:00.000+03:00

Dear S,
I first met you during the days of my "golden phase". You were a complete stranger and we would jus meet occasionally for one of our leisure period... You were fair skinned, vivacious, enterprising and I could jus go on and on about you... I was, at that time, completely de -moralized, the trepidation of people who were good looking was so sturdy in me and that held in me reserved from you. You belonged to one of that "happening" gang from which I would completely distance myself due to the timidity of myself. But as days passed, you had initiated our amity or rather the liaison... We’d slowly become acquaintances ; we talked during the class hours; we messaged while we were apart; we’d those long hours of chatting sessions over phone ; And you were the one who introduced me to the coffee shops, plazas and the other happening hang-out places which honestly are alien land…. and slowly we’d become inseparable... But still on a remote corner of my heart, I was still fighting that freaking diffidence in me… I was unable to over come it completely... you didn’t know about it… or perhaps... I didn’t make you realize it... Time passed as our liaison grew stronger and deeper... You’d almost started confiding your’self’ to me... we were in complete revelation of each other... We found the solace in our relation ship... But yet, dear friend … I could not win over the downbeat emotion; as the time grew and with that we’d also grown and there was that awful day of separation... But still we made sure that we didn’t wobble our liaison... And one day you gave me that sweetest news of your significant other… You were jus SO into him … that you could keep raving about him even if it was a diminutive thing… I can still not forget that grin on your face with you’re already milk - fair cheeks turning pink when ever you get his call… But Dear friend, fate had other plans for us... Some how we lost in touch… It was almost a year that we were unable to commune... By then all good things had happened to you... You got married to this nice person with whom you were really in love... Truly, madly deeply…. And as a result... god had gifted you with little angel… But I wasn’t there to see all those… Am still not able to reason out as to how and why I let you go… I should have taken the least of measures for us to get back what we’d lost… perhaps.. Am I still suffering from that dread ful emotions…. Am not sure… I still hit myself very hard for what I’ve done… Is there anything that I cannot forgive myself is for loosing You… Some day or the other I believe that our paths will cross each other... And we might again have the same color in our life... But still... Am really not sure if I could muster up the courage to look into your eyes and confide everything to you...

Struck by WILB!!???

2009-04-02T14:12:00.000+03:00

Don’t articles such as these encourage us to do more... :-)!
Well, of late yes, there has been lot of browsing, blog hopping and have found many such interesting sites , blogs and so on.. But this has definitely not flawed the performance as rightly mentioned it has increased.. :-) Or probably its jus reckoning the statement given..

Yaavarum Nalam: A Scary Date :-) !!!

2009-03-31T15:36:00.000+03:00

Ok,, So finally HD (none other my Hubby Darling :-))decided to take me to a movie after a long insistence from my side. But we being on the two extremes of movie buffs, we’d to choose within the constrained options to satisfy both our akin. Amidst lot of thoughts juggling, HD finally roped in to watch Madhavan’s recent horror-flick movie Yaavarum Nalam half-heartedly. Should definitely say it wasn’t completely a bad idea. I was so engrossed about this movie for some reasons:
It’s been a real long time since Maddy aka Madhavan’s had a Tamil release.. I should say, he’s one of the very finest actors who would portray the roles given to him in a very neat and decent style and does a complete justification to the characters he plays.
The Genre of the movie: I am that kind of a filmi fan who would like to watch a varied flavor of movies and has been long time since I’d watched a horror movie.
And that made me to insist on watching this movie. Ok, did it fulfill my hope?? I can say yes because the film is refreshingly different unlike the usual run-of-the-mill love stories or the vengeful films. There were no "ghostly" figures or some kind of voice which will frighten the audience. And the ghosts had come in different medium to scare us away. There were no caricatures of a person created jus to jolt the viewers. And on the performances area; Maddy has shouldered the movie with zeal. With subtle expressions on his face in romancing his wife, getting scared when he experiences strange things, in comedy sequences, worrying for his family members, Maddy enthrals the audience. That was a treat to watch him. Not to forget about Saranya who has portrayed the TV -Serial -mania -hit mother with an ease. Her portrayal of the character is quite natural that we can as well relate her to any person in our family.
On the flip side, yes, there were few flaws which we are at times quite inane, but no movie can be made blemish less and this movie is no exemption.
In a nutshell, the movie is worth the watch, at least for proletarian movie watchers like us, who would really not be concerned about how the movie was created.
Ok, now I will have to mention about my HD’s choice movies. He’s one person who likes to watch only the feel-good factor movies His objective of watching a movie is jus for the leisure and to him the movie HAS to end on a "they-lived-happily –ever- after" note. There must not even be an ounce of violence or this kind of horror. So, that would recapitulate on the kind of pressure I would have to put on to make him accept to watch the movie. It was really mirthful to see HD cuddle on to the seat with his hands closing his ears with "please-do-not kill –me" look on his face even and clinging on to my hands for support to the scenes which weren’t even a bit scary. It was rather a treat to watch him this way…:-)

Raja Ko rani Se Pyar ho gaya…. :-) PART-1

2009-02-16T15:03:00.000+03:00

And surely not in the pehli nazar… It’s been more than a year since I knew this wonderful person Mr.K; a year since we got engaged; and above all it’s been six months of our nuptial. Ok, as I was surprisingly idle at home and was flipping thro our wedding album for the N th time, I was jus re-living those moments.

The 13th of Jan 2008 was the usual lazing Sunday morning until I received a call from this prospective to-be groom. He’d wanted to meet me in person before we could actually get into the proposal. And amidst lot of anxiety, I was getting prepared to meet a guy whom I’d never ever thought of his existence before. And there my mom was all over her heels and she was actually even more hyped than I could be and was giving away her thoughtful tips to me as though she was preparing me for the board exams. I personally was emotion-less!! As I really didn’t know how and what to react, probably I was cursing this entire system of arranged marriages. I didn’t have an ounce of clue of what exactly was it going to happen there or the least what should I really talk to this guy. With an unclear vision and mindful of thoughts I stepped into that meeting place with a delay of fifteen minutes against our scheduled time. And yeah, there THE GUY was,
We’d a small introduction and I spoke fewer words and then there yours truly jus got back to her shell and the Guy did the entire talking. We spoke about a lot of things and finally the Guy wound the discussion by saying; “ See, Iam very slow in deciding things and probably will take some time to decide on the same.. till then I think we can be friends:. And that was the signing off message from the guy. (Oh God!! What’s really happening around me!! I’d been to meet this guy who was supposedly the prospective groom to be but then here’s the guy informing that till he decides on things he wants jus to FRIENDS… Can imagine the kind of bewilderment I could have gone thro’) .. Ok I’d to come and announce my already apprehensive Mom regarding this meet.. And as guessed I gave her an even more baffled reply of our decision.. as I’d to put a big full stop to her never-ending questions .. After a day or two of this, I again received a message from the Guy saying he would like to meet me regarding his decision and finally we met and guess what!!! The guy declared his interest on proceeding with the proposal.. and guess what would have been the reply from yours truly… A Week’s time for me to decide….;-) well that was really not a vengeful act but I really wanted time to think as I’d not thought about the entire thing for the two days.. I didn’t want to.. Because I was really not sure of what the outcome of that meeting would be.. So I jus didn’t want to be an early bird and decide on things , if every thing turned the other way round( yeah I know I was lil pessimistic about that) But now, I’d to think about lot of things but my main concern was supporting my parents and my sponsor child… because to an extent both would be a life long commitment.. so whoever accepts me should accept for this even… But then again he crux of this situation was like if I don’t again sit and talk with him .. I might know what exactly runs thro’ his mind… so , again I called him and spoke my mind and wanted his thoughts on this.. And to my surprise.. he readily accepted it and was like “so what?? Jus like am supporting my family you could even.. so I don’t think this should be an issue…”

Even after this will yours truly delay the proceedings…J NEVER!! And so finally we gave the final go-ahead to our respective families… Yes, all this while the families were never in the picture and it was purely OUR decision to go ahead…
And then………

To Be Continued….

Puthum Puthu Bhoomi Vendum……

2008-01-19T10:31:00.000+03:00

I happened to listen to one of those programs on radio where the public can call and confess to the RJ about their problems which they could not share with any of their fellow mates. Undoubtedly 90% of the callers will talk about their relationship problems..

I was particularly flummoxed when one caller was literally sobbing because his girl friend had not spoken to him for months together over a small misunderstanding..

And with those kind of news that’s going all around me of the breakups, broken engagements and stuff.. Has seriously left me in conjecture if all this was worth the whining?? And guess what; most of whiners will be men. I’ve always wondered what makes this man-woman relationship an intricate one of all the other ones. But I’ve to admit one thing that, from my personal observations, it’s always the men who’s being embittered on the whole process. Am actually ashamed to say this, but I believe that’s the scenario in today’s fast-food- based relationships. Well not that am advocating for men here, but it’s so pathetic to the way they are being handled. And for most, the reason is very simple of being a victim to the “family influence”. Oh C’mon, give me a break!!! Will you be able to accept the same if a guy decides to abandon you for the same rationale? Wouldn’t all hell break loose and that guy and his family been stoned for being a butcher of woman’s rights? Here, I would like to put as a disclaimer that am talking about that woman who is not worth talking about their rights. And as always rights are being misunderstood. Does the woman activists on the street who parade and fight for these kind of rights?? If yes, then am proud to call myself as a one who do not believe in woman rights.. Why on earth do we've to lead our life with such complexities when we have much better options of leading it peacefully?

Of all that has been said before, am not trying to portray a picture-perfect- woman of Myself. But maybe am playing cards safely. After all that I’ve seen and heard, I’ve started to really not trust in those relationships. I may not have very adventurous stories for me to tell my grand children but at least I can look straight in their eyes and say that I’ve not injured anyone without a feel of guilt.

Engayum, Eppodhum Sangeetham Sandhosham…. :-)

2008-01-09T06:57:00.000+03:00

For some books are passion, for some surfing, chatting and so would be passion.. But for most am sure Music would be the passion. (Well here, by passion I mean something to do as far as recreation is considered.) And to me, it’s something more.. Like one of the Rajini’s famous dialogue goes… “I eat Music, I sleep Music and walk Music.” What started as jus a Stress Buster turned out to be a very integral part of Me. Music has to be with Me wherever I go and in what ever I do. Here are the few of my picks from my everlasting list of all time favorite hits:

To begin with, Poove sem Poove from Solla thudikkuthu mansau:

This is my child hood fav song. Man, Am jus so in love with this song. It’s one among the best and beautiful compositions of Ilayaraja Sir.And above all. The singing Maestro, K.J.Yesudas sir’s divine voice. Even now when I listen to this song on ear phones, I drive past my child hood memories. This is one such song which makes your soul calm and shows the true happiness within us.

Thalattuthe Vanam…

I consider this song to be one of the best of Ilayaraja’s Romnatic hits. This song itself describes the story ina nut shell. And not to forget about Janaki Amma’s rendition of the song. She would start the song with a husky and quixotic voice and would maintain it through the song keeping up with the pace and the mood of the song. The music and the voice would mutually complement one another. Each time I hear this song, I would sense a new feel of emotion which will surely harmonize with my mood at that time.

Azhagae Sugama…. from Paarthale paravasam :

And this is Rahman sir’s one of the brilliant song ever composed by him.One could die for the last few minutes of the song. Well am really not gonna delve into the review of this master piece song.Any music lover would surely feel the soul of the song.

Udaya Udaya…. from Udaya

This is again an under rated song of Rahman Sir’s.. But, Jus listening to this soft romantic number on earphones on a nice breezy day with gentle rain and cup of not-so- hot tea and then am sure this will take you places….

Ae Hairathe…. from Guru

Well, I’ve jus deeply fallen in love with this song. The voices of Hariharan ji and Alka ji have so blended well that you could really not tend to stay away from the music. And not to forget about Rahman sir’s small but the best part which goes like….. dum dara dum dara…. WOW!!! If there’s any other jargaon to it.. please use it..

Poi solla kudathu kadhali… from Run..

One of the best of Vidyasagar sir’s music… And not to forget Hariharan Ji’s rendition of the song…Few songs can be much appreciated only if could hear even the minutest of the sound… and this song is one… This is My all time favourite one…

Well.. well this post is going a too long one with my hit lists… and see that much how is I like.. I can jus go on and on and on.. but for now let me stop here and I shall again come back with another list and not to forget about my favourite musicians… :-)

To Be continued…..

An ode to the Ustad of Music

2008-01-06T13:50:00.000+03:00

Prologue: This is an ode to one of the greatest living marvel from one of his ardent fan out of millions.

Dear Sir,

You made a reverie debut humbly and then on you never looked back.

Your entry made a mark to the Tamil cinema where you are solely responsible for making the entire world to look back to our kind of music. You brought in the respect that we’d deserved for a long time. You always handled out things with a zeal, be it when they were trying to pitch you against the vandemataram controversy or what ever it may be.. You made sure that your head is fixed straight on the neck at what ever be the heights you are . You commanded respect by showing immense modesty and dignity. You’d always let your music speak rather than you by your self doing the talk.You truy live the life of one true Musician.

Sir, you’ve been and wil continue to be the source of inspiration to the millions of today’s youth, and I being one among them neither have the age wish you on your special day nor am fit to do one, but surely, you are on my daily prayers for your well being and would strive to live a life like you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIR :-)

Regards,

One of your aficionado among the millions

Happy New Year!!!

2007-12-29T13:12:00.000+03:00

Now that there's one more year drawing the curtains to close and in the verge of a brand new year,
I wish every one a Very happy and Prosperous New Year ahead with all your dreams coming true and the almighty showering every one with loads and loads of love.:-)

I, Me,Myself

2007-07-19T21:28:00.000+03:00

You Inner Gender is Female

You're sensitive, caring, and willing to connect with anyone who's open to you.You make friends easily, and you enjoy all sorts of conversations.You understand most people you meet - better than they understand themselves. You're totally a woman... or at the very least, your soul is female.

What's" Your Inner Gender?

Courtesy: IBH:-)

Kalam Thuje Salam....

2007-07-08T08:43:00.000+03:00

Is there any person who is most widely respected, loved, adored , celebrated and whatnot unanimously by all walks of life.. well if this question was asked a decade ago, maybe we could have thought a lot and ultimatelly end up in a no-answer reaction.. but now.. even a kid could give his name effortlessly.. and that's Dr. Kalam. The phenomenal transition from the scientist-teacher-president is any normal man's dream...

I'd really not preferred for Dr. Kalam to become a president in the irst place itself.. yes, true, it's because we all know what role a President play in a Democratic country... The elucidation of his dediaction in whatever he does his presidency period.. He'd maintained the dignity of the country's highest position during the times when politicians were constantly trying to drag him to this political gutters... He'd proved that he was not a puppet by returning the office of profit bill back to the the government who had actually proposed his name for the presidency candidature..At any given point of time, he commanded respect from every one with his simplicity, candor and he'd carried himself with a zeal.

With all this , I'd really not liked even the idea of Dr. Kalam's second term.. And now that it's not happening, like Kalam had mentioned before there is 'something' else which is calling him. His passion.. teaching.. and there a whole generation is waiting for him to lead and work collectively to make his vision .. or rather.. his Dream.. to come true ..

Welcome Back Kalam.. Let's begin our journey..

Adhu oru kanakalam:-)

2007-07-01T20:53:00.000+03:00

I 'd once received this message from my good old college friend which begins " gone are the days ... The stuff which it had conveyed was exactly my good old college days.... I got thinking about a lot of the stuff and that's how ended up in this post..
-----------
On July18th 2001 was "THE DAY" in my life in which there was this sudden transition.... my first day in college!!Our's was a complete Men's college and it was only two years before they had changed it to co-ed.As soon as the college gates were wide opened infront of me, I could see only guys heads and for a moment I could not stop thinking if I were in a wrong place, but sooner as a sigh of relief I could finally trace few girls... Actually the ratio of men to women would have been say 10 : 1 and that explains the scarcity of women in our college...Our class had a strength of 48 out of which we were only 8 girls (and even that got reduced after two of them chose for the morning sessions) and should I have to really elucidate on the fun we could have had..

Since we , girls, were in less numbers so the option of finding the 'best desks' was completely ruled out , as it was already been 'attacked' by our fellow mates and so we were made to sit right under-the-nose of our lecturers. But, that was not an issue at all, coz most of our lecturers would jus turn towards the board and would keep saying things which were far behind our senses;And here we would be happily passing notes,sleep with our eyes opend and so on.We thought thousand times before we could apply for a holiday during our first year, but then we became 'matured' enough to mass bunk on our final year to watch the then hyped movie Kabhi Kushi Kabhi Gham..

The highlight of our college is our canteen!! You know.. it's like a priced poessession of our college..I would say we've one of the best canteens in the whole of chennai colleges. the food would be outclass and quite affordable. Try checking for the attendance in our canteen, and I would audaciously put forth my belongings in bet of cent percent turn out.. :-)Given the amount of space we'd, it's sure the favourite hangouts for us. And during thebreak time, we could see people from different walks of life. And I still remember how we were literally chucked out of the canteen on our last of the final year exams.. The language hours were the special hours as we'd combined classes with the other departments like Physics, Bio chemistry.. It was a time for us to relax as we really cared a damn about it.. it was more like a P.T. class during our school days..

The best part of those days was our trip to pondicherry which was self organised.. It was during this trip that we all had become one.. we got to know each other and it was out of this trip that I made few wonderful friends for life time..

I love my college days.. it was jus during those days when I'd been My'self'.Driving past those days makes me become a 'sentimental Idiot'..

Why, I'm all snify jus about writing this..

PS: As am writing this Simbu & AishwaryaRajnikanth are crooning the wonderful farewell song compode by D. Imman from the movie whistle into my ears with "Natpae natpae..."

Pray For Me brother!!!

2007-07-01T08:51:00.000+03:00

No it's no was a review to the wonderful song composed and sung by the legend!!!! It's this perturbing news articles in the past few days .... Lot has been talked and written about this but still, parts of India is still oblivious about it and still the government is yet to eradicate the stigma related to HIV and it's victims. News such as this
explains the hard- hit truth of the real INDIA.. This is was a true eye opener for a person like me who was gloating about my country's roboust growth in all fields, but it took a while for me to accept that this so-called "feel-good-factor" projected by the politicians during the times of their power hunt was just an illusion and it's not that I believed in those promos but jus had a simple pleasure of thinking it to be one heaven. But here, the government cannot be wholly responsible for the this scenario. With this new age of media revolution, things like these are exposed in a much bigger way, giving no room for the detractors of humanity to find a loop hole, in that way, three cheers to Media!!! Like a very famous quote goes,"only if both the hands get together the noise would explode".. and so , only if people become more civilised and they decide to drive away the ignorance, such atrocities against human would completely washed away. Let me hope that atleast my next gen do not go thro' all this and atleast they become a symbol of hope for my better INDIA!!!

Being ME!!!

2007-05-13T21:19:00.000+03:00

Come this monday and here am gonna turn twenty three!!! jus staggered by the thought of it...
23 years have rolled out in being ME!!!! Pondering over the thought of how life has been these years... could not help myself in going thro' a nostalgic trip....

I was a very abnormal child.. ya. u heard it right... Abnormal child...( may be still Am:-))
well, I could really say I'd a very bad childhood days.... All I tasted during those days was hatred, complexes, ego ,bullying, mocking, frustration on and on and on... given a chance I would never ever will opt for the same.. But the most wonderful thing that has happened to me are my buddies whom I still hold close to my heart....

Then came my most wonderful phase of life... College days :-) put me on a time machine and order me to go back in life... I would surely go back to those golden days.... friends, class rooms , lecturers, my language classes, mass bunking, those humpty number of holidays, and above all my canteen...... WOW!!!!! I can jus go on and on and on and on....this phase of life is one which is worth writing a long post... and I would surely do...

And then came the this part of where I realised ME... this happened when my mom had to join my dad in seychelles and I was left back alone to deal my life... well that was lil crucial for my coz, I'd to do a balancing act between my studies, project, job interviews and also to take care of the house... well it was disgusting. frustrating ... but now when I look back... I think I could take some pride in me for having dealt it with zeal...:-)

In a nutshell, life these years has been a roller -coaster ride and now Am really not sure of what god has in store for me the rest of life, but whatever it is having full faith in the almighty lemme give it a chance...

Ranting here, ranting there and ranting every where...

2007-04-27T22:58:00.000+03:00

* Mom says to spend more time with her..

* Dad asKs me to do lotof things at the same time..

* Sis orders me to be more responsible and organised..

* Bro-in-law warns me being over weight...

* Boss wants me to concentrate more on my job...

And here, Me wants a sovereignty ..

Wedding of the Year????!!!!

2007-04-22T17:25:00.000+03:00

A lot has gone in the last few days for this much hyped wedding.... the so-called news channels trying to get the coverage when they were not even allowed to stay near the vicnity , lots of internet pages dedicated to the same as though it was the first time ever happening in the history since manKind came into existence.... the radio stations giving update of what the groom was doing at that given point of time..... Phew!! that was way beyond imagination... No gifts for guessing what all this is about... It's very much about the "Abhi-Ash saga".

well, am not trying to preach that the media should stop being frenzier for these tabloid news rather than concentrating on the rather important issues like inflation, human traffikking and so on... coz, we really can't hold on to too much of serious issues, but my fury is that why does media and people have to go gaga when they weren't even given the basic respect for a human...
The scenes outside Mr.Bachchan's residence was jus disheartening . The scenes of the photographers and few fans being caned was jus perturbing , and in one corner of my mind, I'd started thinking that these guys truly deserve it for relegating themselves to this unworthy thing. This was an ordeal of pure anguish. Hope that media and public in general try to become more civilised and be more responsible

BACK WITH A BANG!!!

2007-04-08T10:17:00.000+03:00

And hey I know that this is what I would always tell myself after I would come back from a very long hibernation.... Each time I would write a post I would promise myself that I would regularly blog but some how I would never really not keep that up..for what ever reasons it might be...

The last six months was full of abuzz with tons of activities and tremendous changes in life... all for good..:-)

Not long before had I written this post cribbing about my first job and here am settled in my dream job and happily working for eleven hours.
The most awaited event of the year, the new entrant to our family finally happened bringing in all the joy, happiness.. promoting me to a new post ,CHITTHI... my darling sis gave birth to a beautiful baby girl... this is best thing which could ever happen to our family... :-)
The next best thing which could happen was to my best friend as she had finally found her significant other and happilly settled in life.. only to look more plumpier:-)
And finallly the D-Day had arrived for me to virtually get the touch og the tiny thing for whom I'd been waiting for almost 15 months.... Yes, after a long break of 3 and half years I saw my sis, my bro-in-law and ultimately, our bundle of joy.... KAJU:-)

The above events is worth writing a post itself which would surely do in coming days.. specially about our Kaju...:-)

Looking forward to keep up my promise..... and am sure I would..

THE MOZART OF CHENNAI!!!!

2006-08-27T09:49:00.000+03:00

And that's how The Ultimate of Music-DA ONE ARR is proudly known as.... My one and only MATINEE IDOL.What's that am more attracted towards this maestro??? Is it the music or HIM?? Maybe both!!!More than him I think it's his music which talks more.Forthrightly,Iam no way entitled to comment on this genius's music.Apart from his music, the other thing which never fails to amuse me whenever I think about him is his modesty and his passion towards music.One classic example for his dedication was evident in his reply for a very usual question like "what's your activity during free time?", Guess what was his reply!"I listen to all kinds of music and I take this time as an oppournuity to listen to other's music".... Is there anything else required to elucidate his commitment towards his profession or rather his Passion?? Am sure the journey from his Jingles to his now international ventures would have not been an trouble-free one.. Inspite of this huge success, he has his head fixed straight over his shoulder.. and that's the reason why his fans worldwide celebrate him like this

Kurai Ondrum illai....

2006-08-08T09:06:00.000+03:00

Amma has always been a great fan of this song.. I've seen totally losing herself when she starts singing this song... And couple of times have heard it in many of our family occassions.. but unlucky me, all these did not make a great impact... it was jus an another song .. not until my mom, after long incisive, bought the CDs of this song... And that was first time i heard the song in MS amma's bravura voice.. Man!! then I knew why my mom was totally into the song... No..am not goona give my review about this song.. am not anyway worth commenting on the song or on the divine voice ... All am here to say is how the song has brought in a change to me..Whenever i play this in ipod,it jus gets straight into my heart flushing out all my sunken emotions and blessing with a tranquil ,free-of emotions spirit and make me flutter light in the air ... Whenever i listen to this song it always helps me shed the sense of self and never failed to remind me of the ultimate power which is very much in me...and finally making me even sing Kurai ondrum illai along with her..

God's Own Child!!!

2006-08-06T07:34:00.000+03:00

Yeah... that's the title given to me by none other than yours truly :-) Well, why shouldn't I.. when I have all the reasons for a self-proclamation... Family and friends are the imperative factors in any individual 's life.... which is very true in my life.I've jus handful of friends whom i can truly rely upon for anything and everything under the sun. TG,C,S,V, are the integral part of mine... Sharing 14 years of realtionship ... I hold them tight closely to my heart and i go down the memory lane to my good old schoo days.
Tg : My darling :)she's one girl who had never failed to amuse me with kind of mellowness she would face life, and have never seen loosing her cool whatever may be the intensity of problems ..even with so many years rolled out.. she still does it.. but if truth to be told, i really love the moments when she would unexpectedly bring out the hidden child in her.. I LOVE YOU di.. for whatever you are...

C The most respectable friend i have.. With tons of responsibilities sitting right on top of his head, I've never seen him in a goaded or in a dreary mood.. believe me!!! though the almighty has been lil injustice, he's always accepted it with a welcoming and confident smile... You go ahead da!! am really proud of you...:-)

S My partner in all the mischevious operations!! Infact s and me were friends from second standard... Forthrightly, it was both of us who were the happy-go-lucky ones of our gang..Though this guy would seem to be playful.. he's always been focussed.. n that's the reason he's now the member of the most privileged institution ICAI.hmmm.. ya you heard it right.. am now a proud friend of an young chartered account:-)...

V she's the newbie of our gang,who's gonna become the integral part of s :-).and now my only wish is let the almighty give rest three of us the same kind of life-partners.:-)
I cherish those moments we spent together and they are still afresh in my memories ... which will always remain till the curtains of my life comes to a draw finally... you are my priced possessions...
Like someone wrote :
Vannangalaga thanitthu vanthom...
Vanvil aga seirundhu nindrom...
We all met as strangers,and as the time flew, became the best est of friends... saw each other grow from child to adult.. and would still see the transformation with generations coming....

Destroyed in Love....

2006-08-04T10:56:00.000+03:00

Being an exotic movie buffer, I don't watch movies jus for the heck of watching it. I would really delve into the logics and techniques of the movie and would like something which has a substance. So, in that case, I would very rarely get to watch movies.After a real long break, I happened to watch the then much hyped movie FANAA.Though the movie was not an astonishing one, but to my surprise, I sat glued to the screens without much fidgety.Contemplating on what made me tied up in the seats, It was jus the on-screen chemistry happening between stylish Aamir and the svelte-stunning and the -ever beautiful -Kajol.This was apparent in those romantic jiffies in the songs of Dekho naa.. and haath mein... Man!! I was totally lost in the movie... and didn't realise that movie had come to an end.. But truly this was the first movie watched by me for pure entertainment.

LIFE IS LIKE THAT!!

2006-08-03T09:03:00.000+03:00

For all those who wondered where was I for the past six months(If only someone had really done!!;-) ), well most of the time trying unsuccessfully to understand the nitty-gritties of life.. For a girl like me, who always refused to come out of the "protecting blanket" of family's love and affection; who was an agnostic about people's behaviour, or rather, "misbehaviour"; who was made to view the world with a pink glass to see ONLY good things around me!!! life post-job has surely taken a topsy - turvy turn changing the color of the glasses with more of grey and less of pink.It has jus made to realise the saying that "All that glitters are not gold!! The scathful and inexplicable nature of fellow people has jus made me to realise how tough is it to be a clean slate, wherein people can jus come write over whatever THEY feel and jus get away with not really bothering about the marks they leave behind.With the predominance of sarcasm around, ignominy ,muffling on my stance for sure has been the testimonials of my change in the approach of viewing the world through grey glasses.And with none around to shoulder and understand when it's really a necessitate,life's totally gone rampant. what do these people derive of bickering? Happiness?? If yes, does it really exist for long?These are the few unanswered questions and am really trying hard to find an answer. I wonder how people can jus muck things for others and get away with it and the people at the receiving end are jus left behind flabbergasted . Sometimes, am really not able to resist the feeling of being unfit to insert myself in this world. I've paid a higher cost for having been so oblivious of life and now,better to late than to never have decided not to succumb to these kind of contemptible pressures and fight back the raising odds and do good to myself. And then continue my living in the hope that all bad things will have to come to an end.Hmmm.. i could really not help myself from an yet- another- cribbing post.But what to do LIFE"S LIKE THAT!!!;-)

THE DEVIL RETURNS! :-)

2006-02-19T19:06:00.000+03:00

yes... am back after a real loooong time.Well.... life has taken lil twist during this tenure.it all started when i'd to take a break for my exams.for me exams had always been a nightmare, specially my maths exams! i used to have a tough time in remembering those formulaes and so on...more than the subject it was those frantic looks of my sis which threatened me more.coz, mom always put me on to my sis to teach me maths and my sis hates this job to the core(because i was so dumb in maths) and she would try all means to get rid of the "capital punishment" given to her which would ultimately end up with a quarrel between mom and sis.and there yours truly would escape without noticed:-). ironically, the subject which i majored in my under graduation was MATHS! this came as a surprise to whole of my life... hmmmm... but that's life right? "Expect the Unexpected".Fortunately my management studies are more interesting coz, i don't have to sit and load my brain forcefully.it jus requires our analytical and logical reasoning power, which i love to do! am jus waiting for my results with fingers crossed. lemme hope for the best. And the next big thing was the disappointment i got when my sister after so many thoughts juggling she finally declared that they weren't coming down to India on dec 30th.i'd so many plans about their trip.it was like we would be totally out of station for atleast a month,and there were also plans that we would meet our parents in seychelles but all that was completely shattered. well, it really took a long time for me to accept it, but again as always happen i was forced to accept .

but i think it was a blessing in disguise.coz, it was the same day that i'd to attend a placement interview.and now am placed.there are so many "firsts" in my life. My first interview, My first job, and so on. but again my complaint here is i didn't have anyone to share. i carried back lot of stories, exciting things which happened during my first day on the job only to realise that i didn't have any one to share with.for that matter, i still don't know how my folks are reacting to it.am not able to figure out what exactly they feel with that short duration over phone.am missing them so badly here.anyways as always, lemme try to accept this too.

A SPECIAL MEESAGE TO SPECIAL PERSON

2005-12-23T12:36:00.000+03:00

I LOVE YOU....

for so many reasons,
it would take me all day
to list them....

I LOVE YOU....

because you make me laugh
until i can hardly breathe,

because all i've to do is look at you a certain way
and you know exactly what i'm thinking,

because i can trust you to understand even the things
i'm still trying to figure out...

I LOVE YOU...

because you're real,
all the time,
about everything,
no matter what,
and you help bring out the best in me...

over and over again,
you are truly an AMAZING person

and am proud to call you THE BEST FRIEND of mine..

and for many more reasons, there's no wonder that i celebrate the arrival of my "friend" on this earth nearly 26 years before and that too a day before so that i be the first person to wish on your BIRTHDAY..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AKKA....

AN UNFORGETTABLE WEEKEND

2005-12-08T20:35:00.000+03:00

well... am sure this weekend would have been an unforgettable weekend for most of the chennaites.as a well known factor, chennai witnessed incessant rain from morning till night and it was in this same rain i got drenched for the first time ever in my life:-).i felt like dancing as the heroine of "mazhai",this was somewhere around eleven'o clock in the morning.i was enjoying this climate throughout the day without knowing it's after-effects.it should be around 3.00 am when i woke up to hear the reverberation of people in my colony.but i pay any heed to these reverberations coz it's like a common thing in the area i reside.but in the morning i opened my sit-out door only to see my area surrounded by water,it was as though i was in an island and i was also confused when i saw several women and children lying on the corridors of our building and my neighbouring building too.then later on i heard from my neighbour that flood have washed their homes and now our corridors have become their dwelling places.they had absolutely nothing with them not even the basic facilities they need to have.it was so painful for me to see people having their food on roads ,literally on roads, coz there was no other open space to accomodate these many people at the same time.and moreover this was an unexpected one and so neither the people nor the local governing bodies were prepared to face this kind of situation.and for me, this is the first time am being introduced to these kind of emergency situations and so i was little emotionally moved when i saw all that happening jus infront of my eyes. purely by god's grace there was not a single life loss reported.the corporation's work was really commendable here,normalcy was restored in just about 24 hours of the devastation.but the power cut which lasted for complete four days was the most intolerable thing.i was completely out of touch with the outer world for these four days.it was like almost my life had come to a stand-still without power.obviously,because of power cut for four days, we ran short of water .atleast to stay connected with my sis and parents,i needed mobile or landline which also ran out of battery(my landline is that CDMA connection which runs on battery too),so i'd charge my mobile in a browsing centre.Man!serioulsy i'd a tough time in managing things,but this time am not gonna complain my life coz i've learnt how blessed am.

HUH....

2005-12-02T10:10:00.000+03:00

Life has now become a humdrum for me.It's real hard to play so many roles at the same time.as each day is passing my level of responsiblities are also growing with it. finding real hard to cope with these changes , but surely managing things in a much better way.wondering why all this frustrated thoughts, well.. it was jus that i was having an hectic schedule for the past five days.as i was in the verge of completion of the project had to finish off with my pending work, put my papers in an organised manner, complete my final formalities and finally report to my superior. since this my very first project i'd to put in lot of efforts and had to work meticulously till the end.and after all this , i reached home only to see it in a total dumped state.even the supposedly "booth bungalows" in tamil movies would have been far more better when compared to my home.when i started to clean ,i was wondering how i'd survived for the past three weeks amidst this mess. Now every thing is OVER.but truly, i've never been this occupied in life.now i know what life is .

but from now on am gonna be on my study hols for the exams which would begin by Dec 24th.and this also implies that the arrival of my bro-in-law and sis is also fast approaching:-).this is the only thing which is keeping up my spirits alive.am jus keeping my fingers crossed to hug and cuddle in their arms and shed out my responsibilties and be myself atleast for a month.but before that i still have a long way to go in cleaning my home to make it a presentable one before my bro-in-law steps in. because he's one person who does not compromise on cleanliness even for a million dollar deal.i still remember the day when it was jus few hours of his arrival from UK, the first thing he did was to clear his baggage and put those things in their respective places and at the same time cleared off the mess in his room.he was continuously working till he'd cleaned his comb which he'd used on his stay at UK.though he would not expect this level from me, but i should atleast try to satisfy his minimum expectation.hope i do that:-).

TRUE EMPOWERMENT...

2005-11-24T21:37:00.000+03:00

Few months back when i was doing my usual thing- to flip through the channels, suddenly i stopped to my surprise to watch a tamil-speaking woman on BBC.she was explaining the process of how she had arranged her daughter's wedding without the help from her husband. while i was trying to figure out what exactly the program was all about, the reporter was talking about some concept called SELF HELP GROUPS. till that time , i hardly had any idea about these groups.though the program did not give me the whole idea about these groups, it did throw some light on it.short time after that, to my amazement i was informed by my professor that we were going to a place called Ranipet to do a project on that same Self help groups. till we'd reached that place i neither had any idea of what that place was nor my job .the only thing which kept up my spirits was the thought of meeting those women who are actively participating in those groups.A NGO called thirumalai charitable trust had sponsored our trip and it was for this trust we were doing that project.

In the morning, we were briefed about the whole concept of this self help groups and it's benefits.we were given a small presentation right from the history of these groups to the structure and functions of these groups.i was really zapped to know that these self help groups are making waves in my own state,TN(i was lil guilty that i didn't even know this much about my state:-)). this introductory session itself lasted till evening and then finally my most awaited session arrived. we were divided into two groups to meet the beneficiaries, ie, the members of those groups. there were about 108 groups from that place and it's neighbouring places with totally about 25,000 women participating on the whole. and we had a chance to meet one whole group which had about 25 women.i was really astonished to see those complete "village- bred" women flashing a confident and self estmeed smile on their faces.all these women are into some kind of occupation,though most of them had safely opted to work from home for example, making of incense sticks which does not require much of their time.they were confident in handling both their home and their business.when i asked about their family cooperation, specially from their husbands, majority of them gave their reply by maintaining a "dignified silence".yet i could see the difference that the concept of self help groups have given them.i could feel the true sense of Women Empowerment airing in every moment i spent with those truly confident women.It was a real experience for me.

Apart from those emotional notes, i did see some lapses in this concept.of all those, the major concerned one was that the loans which are lent to these women mainly goes in to meet their personal needs rather than indulging in any of the income-generating activity. if this is not mended, then the main objective of SELF HELP GROUPS goes unnoticed.hope they might change over a period of time.

LIFE WITHOUT MOM....

2005-11-24T09:25:00.000+03:00

It's been almost two and a half weeks since my mom flew to seychelles with my dad.And from then on it's yours truly who is managing the whole show,ie, right from managing house-hold chores to my official and personal needs.this is the most unbelievable and miraculous thing which can happen to me: leading a life sans my mom. I was this girl who would depend upon her for every little thing i do, right from what channel i need to watch to decide whether i need to attend my that day's classes or not. if you'd by now thought that am a school going girl, pardon me, am pursuing my management studies. somehow, i grew under her shelter completely.Honestly i liked it too. But the last two weeks has taught loads of things to me.It has taught how selfishly i've dealt my mom and how i've taken an undue advantage on her under the protective cover of being her daughter.But now the entire scenario has changed. i wake up with thought of what all things i've to complete for that day.i've begun to be more organised and try to do my work independantly in an effective and efficient manner.
I do have some complaints about this way of life. sometimes it's highly irritating and frustrating to do everything wholly by me. but it's this period which had taught me some valuable lessons in my life apart from what i said above. i've realised the value of relationships. for the past two weeks ,my sis makes it a point to call me twice a day!(for those wondering where she's.. she's in US right now) she's very much worried about me here.my parents call up atleast once in two days and not to forget my friends, they are keeping me occupied by messaging and calls till i go to sleep.am feeling elated about all these because i always complain of loneliness and i also have a feeling that know one cares about me. this thought of mine have proved that am wrong.:-)

But yes, to me, nothing can compensate my mom's presence.

I MISS YOU MOM..

FINALLY.....

2005-11-24T06:27:00.000+03:00

After a prolonged insistence from my sis, i've finally decided to enter into the world of blog to shell out my thoughts and ideas!it's been a real loooong time since i'd written something off my academics.if my guess is right, i last wrote for my school competition(though i lost it!:-) ).
now, i really want an outlet for all my thoughts and i know this is the best way for it.so, lemme start here and try to build on this.