Friend, My Earnest Apologies….

Dear S,
I first met you during the days of my "golden phase". You were a complete stranger and we would jus meet occasionally for one of our leisure period... You were fair skinned, vivacious, enterprising and I could jus go on and on about you... I was, at that time, completely de -moralized, the trepidation of people who were good looking was so sturdy in me and that held in me reserved from you. You belonged to one of that "happening" gang from which I would completely distance myself due to the timidity of myself. But as days passed, you had initiated our amity or rather the liaison... We’d slowly become acquaintances ; we talked during the class hours; we messaged while we were apart; we’d those long hours of chatting sessions over phone ; And you were the one who introduced me to the coffee shops, plazas and the other happening hang-out places which honestly are alien land…. and slowly we’d become inseparable... But still on a remote corner of my heart, I was still fighting that freaking diffidence in me… I was unable to over come it completely... you didn’t know about it… or perhaps... I didn’t make you realize it... Time passed as our liaison grew stronger and deeper... You’d almost started confiding your’self’ to me... we were in complete revelation of each other... We found the solace in our relation ship... But yet, dear friend … I could not win over the downbeat emotion; as the time grew and with that we’d also grown and there was that awful day of separation... But still we made sure that we didn’t wobble our liaison... And one day you gave me that sweetest news of your significant other… You were jus SO into him … that you could keep raving about him even if it was a diminutive thing… I can still not forget that grin on your face with you’re already milk - fair cheeks turning pink when ever you get his call… But Dear friend, fate had other plans for us... Some how we lost in touch… It was almost a year that we were unable to commune... By then all good things had happened to you... You got married to this nice person with whom you were really in love... Truly, madly deeply…. And as a result... god had gifted you with little angel… But I wasn’t there to see all those… Am still not able to reason out as to how and why I let you go… I should have taken the least of measures for us to get back what we’d lost… perhaps.. Am I still suffering from that dread ful emotions…. Am not sure… I still hit myself very hard for what I’ve done… Is there anything that I cannot forgive myself is for loosing You… Some day or the other I believe that our paths will cross each other... And we might again have the same color in our life... But still... Am really not sure if I could muster up the courage to look into your eyes and confide everything to you...